So you have secured the date and you want to know how to do well. The first date is always difficult, you will be nervous and want to make a good first impression on him or her but you also want to know if he or she is worth your time.
Conversation is an extremely important part of the first and the silences can be really awkward so choosing an appropriate venue is of paramount importance, you want somewhere that is not too loud but where there is enough going on that the silences are not too uncomfortable. Many people choose to just have a drink on the first date, others choose a dinner date restaurants and bars can both make good venues for a first date. Keep the venue local if you can.
Once you have chosen the right venue you want the conversation to flow naturally. Don’t rehearse what you are going to say and don’t focus too much on trying to impress the other person, it is better to try and really get to know them, don’t try and tell jokes unless you are naturally funny. Don’t talk about politics or religion, never bad mouth a previous partner or complain about how terrible your life is. Ask insightful questions like, “what would you do for a job if you didn’t do what you do now and why”. Don’t make any rude comments or give inappropriate compliments.
Women like eye contact, if you watch two women speaking you will notice that they maintain very strong eye contact. Maintaining eye contact shows that you are confident and secure in yourself, it will also help the woman to trust you and feel safe. Feeling safe is very important to women when they are on a date so don’t stare, look away when they do and try to smile at appropriate times.
Mirroring and Matching
If you watch a couple closely you will see that they have very clear raport, when they interact with each other it will rhythmic when two people feel close to one another their body language and communication are in unison. You can mirror the other person by mimicking their posture and language patterns, using the same words as they do. When they breathe out you breathe out, when they breathe in you breathe in. Don’t make it obvious, they may not be too happy if they catch you.
Patience is a Virtue
Desperation is never a good look for a man or a woman, make sure you don’t look desperate. Don’t be too touchy, feely. This is especially important if you are a man dating a woman, she needs to feel safe in your company. If you are a woman don’t dress too provocatively as this could give the wrong impression.
Don’t Drink Too Much
Whether you are a man or a woman it is never a good idea to get drunk on the first date, maybe have one or two to get in the mood and calm your nerves but make sure you stop there. Don’t drink beforehand either if your date smells alcohol on you they probably won’t be impressed.